Alderaan’s First Mourner // by
darth vader
just when you thought vader’s lava castle couldn’t get any edgier: it has a name and that name is “the dark monolith” (x)
I want to know about his poor assistant….
okay but Vader literally turned off the lights on his chest panel to make an impression on the Rebels. That whole emerging from the darkness by the light of his saber thing? That was intentional dramatic effect. What a drama king.
Leia got away because he wasted 30 seconds scaring the crap outta those poor rebel mooks.
ngl I am low-key worried about Rogue One, but only because my boy Darth Vader is in it, and idk what incarnation of Vader they are going to use.
Filoni!Vader: yEAHHHHHHH!!! i am PUMPED to be on the DARK SIDE man I LOVE KILLING REBELS! *flies a tie-fighter with the Force so his cape can billow while he stands menacingly under a spotlight* I’m angry all of the time and I’m like OBSESSED with killing Obi-Wan! *chugs a Red Bull through his vents* WHO WANTS TO GO NEXT?
Lucas!Vader: high-key wanna die if any of you rebels could do that for me i’d appreciate it. *slaughters thousands of rebels effortlessly* come on man did you even try. damn this self-preservation instinct of mine. *sees obi-wan* HELL YEAH I’M GONNA DIE I CAN’T WAIT! *kills obi-wan in one swing* what.
Comics!Vader: *doesn’t say anything, but if he does it’s going to be one badass line like “ALL I’M SURROUNDED BY IS FEAR AND DEAD MEN”* *has a lot of flashbacks to the time when he had hair* *is sad a lot* *surrounded by quirky fun characters because this is anakin skywalker we are talking about*
Bless you for summing this up so beautifully.
Oh thank God someone said it and it didn’t have to be me.