OH MY GOD
oh my god
btw for anyone updating to windows 10 in the near future:
don’t click the “use recommended settings” button that pops up right after it installs, click the advanced options one and actually read through the stuff you can accept to because there’s some pretty creepy stuff like “use personalised advertising”, “send browser history to microsoft” and “automatically connect to public networks” that you’re gonna wanna turn off lmao
OK STORY TIME I WAS BABYSITTING THIS 6 YEAR OLD BOY AND WE ATE POPSICLES, THIS WAS THE JOKE ON MINE AND I TOLD IT TO HIM, BECAUSE THATS WHAT YOU DO WITH JOKES AND SO LIKE A DAY LATER I GET THIS CALL FROM HIS MOM AND SHE SAYS “My son told me an inappropriate joke today, and he told me he got it from you” AND I WAS SUPER CONFUSED??? SO I ASKED HER WHAT THE JOKE WAS AND APPARENTLY HE SAID “how do skeletons communicate? They bone each other” I AM SO DONE
saying things to children is like playing the world’s riskiest game of telephone
Me, on a date: How do you feel about the regional gothic meme?
Date: I think it’s a little silly I mean it’s just a series of awkward injokes…
I reach for the breadsticks but they aren’t there. The basket is empty. I open my purse and from within it comes tumbling breadsticks. Soft breadsticks. Crunchy breadsticks. Buttered breadsticks. Garlic breadsticks. They cover the table, spilling off onto the floor. My date is looking at me. He does not, can not understand. He is made of flesh. The sticks do not speak to him.
Me: I’m sorry I have to leave immediately.
The breadsticks continue to fall.
When I think about the last big talk I had with Simon, I realize it was probably the most important one of my life.
He took my hand and said his mind was getting worse. He said he felt like a bird that needed to migrate North, and that I needed to be ready in case I had to go on without him. He said he worried what might happen if he really lost it.
Then he said the most important thing, that “demon” is just a word made up by people who are scared. Everyone has good and bad in them and that I should never be afraid.
I thought he was talking about himself and his own shaky mental state. But now I think he was trying to tell me that I’m a demon. Simon wanted me to be OK with who I was.
I owe him for saving my life and pretty much teaching me everything I know. I miss him so much, the poor, crazy guy. I miss him so much.
And I’ll always love him.
Marcy’s Super Secret Scrapbook [x]
