oh my god

lb1205rb:

thedoubteriswise:

what’s funny about the devil’s chord is that it’s a doctor who episode about the beatles that isn’t really about the beatles, except how the plot is:

  1. there is a world filled with music
  2. it is attacked by a shrill, campy villain of indeterminate gender who steals all the music
  3. this eventually results in a gray, lifeless, post-nuclear wasteland
  4. the only survivors who can remember music travel using a machine capable of traversing time and space to ultimately
  5. enlist the help of the beatles, who
  6. bring back music by playing together, magically restoring color and life and defeating the villain

which is also the plot of classic 1968 animated film Yellow Submarine. not clear on how intentional this is.

Prev tags

deathcomes4u:

anarchistmemecollective:

gen-is-gone:

madd-catter:

literallyaflame:

thatgiraffebutt:

cantanopeshitthatwastaken:

It’s interesting how diseases rip through schools at incredible speeds despite being in an arguably modern, clean(ish) environment. I wonder if it has something to do with the whole “you need a doctor’s note to excuse your absence of even one day” combined with the average price of going to a doctor, the lack of education on things like “you’re still contagious even after the fever goes away”, and the overwhelming message of “if you don’t struggle through it, you’re a failure!”

On my campus there tends to be a problem where even I you have the doctors note professors will still take points off of your final grade regardless of how sick you are. I’ve seen people show up to class with the stomach flu, pneumonia, respiratory infections and all sorts of other contagious ailments.

Here’s a fun story:

The school system I grew up in put an absolutely ungodly amount of pressure on kids to Show Up Every Day No Matter What. Many schools are like this, but looking back, my town’s was borderline fucking dystopian. They asked me why I didn’t just “postpone” a surgery at one point— when I was fifteen— to give you an idea of how monumentally obtuse these people were.

So, in elementary school, I started having chicken pox symptoms, right? They were mild because I was vaccinated (yay!) but my mom recognized them quickly and took me to the doctor, because my mom is a reasonable human being with standards. The doctor said “yup, you’ve got those pox, it may seem mild but please for the love of god DO NOT take her to school, she is very contagious even though she may FEEL okay.”

So I had to stay home from school until I got clearance from my doctor to go back. I was an angry little gremlin the whole time, because I wanted to go to the school library and read books about the human skull, but my mother said, “no, you cannot leave this house, and do not scratch the bumps please.” So I sat at home and tried not to scratch the bumps, like a good little gremlin.

A few days into my Chicken Pox Related House Arrest, we got a letter from the school. I was far from the only person with chicken pox, as it so happened. Like… a tenth of my second grade class had Confirmed Pox. We all fell ill within DAYS of each other.

So how did this happen, you ask? Well, a kid had chicken pox, and he came to school anyway. “Ah, well perhaps they didn’t know,” you may very well say. “Maybe his parents didn’t notice!” No. No, they noticed. In fact they KNEW it was CHICKEN POX. They sent him to school anyway.

The kid’s parents…….. were, in fact, teachers at the school. And they KNOWINGLY made him go to school sick, because they didn’t want to risk hurting his precious “perfect attendance” record. They figured that since he wasn’t, like, Literally Dying, it was better for him not to miss school. Never mind the fact that they were actively endangering hundreds of little kids.

Fast forward to my freshman year of college. A kid came to class with mumps because he ‘couldn’t afford to miss’. Guess what happened? Mumps outbreak! Diseases are, as it turns out, good at being diseases! Vaccinations are phenomenal, but they can only do so much, and some people rely on herd immunity to not be killed by preventable illness.

This entire attitude needs to die. It’s dangerous. Food service workers are forced to show up sick, little kids are forced to show up sick, college students show up sick because they’re afraid of flunking out.

And on top of it all, misinformation campaigns are encouraging people not to get vaccinations! It’s 2019 and we’re flirting with the plague! Next thing you know some blogger is gonna be like “actually we should all be fucking rats and eating our meat raw, death to all science and god bless america”

Many kids at my school will show up really sick because we only get like three days of excused absences without a doctor’s note.

this is what those in literary academia call “foreshadowing”

(note the dates)

this post aged like an ice cube in an oven

worst part is! IT’S STILL HAPPENING! SCHOOLS AND WORKPLACES ARE STILL LIKE THIS!!! THEY LEARNED NOTHING!!!!!!!

ralfmaximus:

phae-touched:

dungeonmastersconsortium:

OUTSTANDING

This can’t be real life.

Holy shit it’s real.

Nicknamed “Project 42,” the initiative is believed to involve a purchase of millions of dollars in special glass — large enough that it drew attention from employees last year. Limited liability firms linked to Musk and executives are also known to have bought large volumes of land in the area.

Commence Glass Onion jokes now.

firawren:

Which of these would you rather see on your dash?

Hey @staff. This is a perfect example of why collapsed reblogs is such a bad idea. Seeing the full thread, you go like this:

😮 ooh, that’s cool
😀 “they’re free,” hehe!
🤣 “16 cents,” perfection!!

I have achieved joy, I feel positive feelings toward Tumblr, I want to engage, I want to stay, my eyeballs land on more ads, you make more money, everyone wins! 🎉

Seeing the collapsed thread, you go like this:

😮 ooh, that’s cool
😐 “16 cents”? yes, that’s literally what the pic shows, not sure why you felt the need to say that

There is no motivation for me to uncollapse the reblog chain—it looks like a boring conversation about the denominations of coins. And even if I do uncollapse it, you’ve ruined the joke by showing me the punchline before the setup. I am sad, Tumblr is boring, I go elsewhere to entertain myself, I see less ads, you make less money, everyone loses. 😥

Reblog chains are the best thing about Tumblr. They are your unique super power. They are the thing that makes people screenshot Tumblr and share it around. Why on earth would you kneecap them??

I don’t know exactly how you plan to implement this. Give people the option to keep them collapsed if there truly are people who are annoyed by how long they can get (you already have a version of this feature), but don’t collapse them for everyone or new users by default. Please. It will make Tumblr so much more boring.

luminarai:

teacupmotif:

the new pornbots’ url game is INSANE. complicit-rotting and warmmourning you would have done numbers if you were real

these are some of my most recent favs

These are actually the most recent ones, really strong start

I feel like I know both of these people, I know exactly what they’d reblog

Here I was like ‘ok I’m not gonna top this’ but

I was wrong. Incredible work everyone

i’m so confused rn, can you explain the goncharov thing?? i get off tumblr for five minutes

hussyknee:

Lmaoooo

Nah I getchu. So this post has been circulating for like a year:

But yesterday, it had inspired someone to do this:

Next thing I knew there were fake Letterboxed reviews.

Goncharov moodboards. Really good ones.

Meta analysis. So many fake meta essays. Disturbingly good ones. And of course the memes.

As you can see, the myth just started to grow, characters and ships and tropes being added one after the other, almost bizzarely without contradiction, until there was enough of shape to the whole thing for people to start posting fanfic about it on AO3. “Ice-pick Joe” has already become a meme tag.

It was hilarious in the beginning, but the way it’s developed within less than a day, kind of like it’s being willed into existence, is freaking me out a bit. We’re toying with powers beyond our comprehension. 😂😂😂

Of course, there could be an ulterior motive as well.

osterfields:

osterfields:

tom holland just posted a video on instagram like “I’m sorry that there’s no new news on the spiderman sequel but I just got the script I’m about to read it!!” and he held up the script and it said “spider-man: far from home” so yeah he just spoiled the spider-man sequel title while announcing he had no news on the spider-man sequel,, good job tom

mess

peter-pantomime:

comparativelysuperlative:

prokopetz:

thesparkofrevolution:

blacktyranitar:

thesparkofrevolution:

jakovu:

dama3:

tastefullyoffensive:

Babylonian era problems. (photo via tbc34)

old school hate mail

Imagine how pissed you have to be to engrave a rock

Ok but there was this guy called Ea-nasir who was a total crook and would actually cheat people ought of good copper and sell them shit instead.
The amount of correspondences complaining to and about this guy are HILARIOUS.

Are you telling me we know about a specific guy who lived 5000 years ago, by name, because he was a huge asshole

More like 4000 years ago but yes. Ea-nasir and his dodgy business deals.

And we haven’t even touched on the true hilarity of the situation yet. Consider two additional facts:

  • He wasn’t just into copper trading. There are letters complaining about Ea-nasir’s business practices with respect to everything from kitchenwares to real estate speculation to second-hand clothing. The guy was everywhere.
  • The majority of the surviving correspondences regarding Ea-nasir were recovered from one particular room in a building that is believed to have been Ea-nasir’s own house.

Like, these are clay tablets. They’re bulky, fragile, and difficult to store. They typically weren’t kept long-term unless they contained financial records or other vital information (which is why we have huge reams of financial data about ancient Babylon in spite of how little we know about the actual culture: most of the surviving tablets are commercial inventories, bills of sale, etc.).

But this guy, this Ea-nasir, he kept all of his angry letters – hundreds of them – and meticulously filed and preserved them in a dedicated room in his house. What kind of guy does that?

[ source ]

Okay, but imagine from the other guy’s point of view. You send angry letters about how Ea-nasir shipped you half a ton of subpar copper, and then 3800 years later—

History: you are without a doubt the worst business man ive ever heard of

Ea-nasir: