Today my parents dropped a box of my old Barbies, and associated dolls and paraphernalia, off at my house! I was DELIGHTED, because I never expected to see any of them again!
They, their Barbie Travelin’ House Playset, and all their various accessories are in, ur… relatively good condition? Let me introduce you to them!
When I was a kid sometimes my parents would take us to Aquasplash, an indoor water park in Hemel Hempstead. (Britain has very few outdoor water parks for obvious reasons.) Aquasplash was a disgusting unhygienic poorly put together deathtrap of a place, by which I mean it was the best thing EVER.
Here’s one of the few pics of the pool which seem to exist. Imagine it packed full with hundreds of screaming kids, and you’ve about got the flavour of it.
It was all inside this building, the Jarman Park Leisure World. I remember there was a cinema next to it. I have this really clear memory of standing in the queue to get into Aquasplash, and on one side of me there was the window which showed you what was going on in the pool, and on the other side there was the Lord of the Rings Argonath poster all lit up to entice you into the movie. That little scene could sum up the whole of 2001 for me really.
I was OBSESSED with this place. I think I have a whole bunch of journal entries from my childhood where I just talked about how awesome Aquasplash was. It was up there with Disneyworld for me. Braving the Space Bowl (the green water slide you can see up there, it deposited you into a sort of massive bowl) was legit one of the proudest moments of my childhood.
Man, not a single photo of the Space Bowl in its prime was ever taken I guess. You can just about make it out in this picture I found, it’s the big green, well, bowly thing.
See where all those people are sitting? Those are seats from the Burger King which was on the side of the water park! You could climb out of the pool overstimulated and drenched and HAVE A BURGER!
I loved that so much as well, even though my parents wouldn’t allow me back in the pool for half an hour after I’d eaten in case I died.
Here’s what it looked like at the very top, complete with netting that wouldn’t stop a rubber beach ball falling down, let alone a child. “The Abyss” is about right. Also I can’t remember which ride “The Abyss” was, but one of the three rides at the top was literally never open/always broken, maybe it was that one.
LOOK! Look how grimy yet wonderful it all is!
Anyway today I found these old photos on my hard drive. I didn’t take them (didn’t take any of the pics in this post) and even though I saved the link I got them from, it’s a dead link now alas. It’s pics of the place being demolished back in 2014ish.
I was FUCKING DEVASTATED. I still am a little bit, in a way, someone could have bought the pool and (hopefully) sorted it out a bit. Made a new generation of kids deliriously happy and maybe at times actually delirious! But it never happened…
This picture is the worst for me because I used to stand in that exact spot, waiting to get a rubber ring and experience a five-second slide across the pool. It was always freezing cos the emergency exit was right next to it.
This is the end point of the rapids ride, I think. That one was my favourite.
And this I believe is the earthly remains of both the Space Bowl (I think) and another ride I don’t remember the name of, but do remember you were guaranteed a massive wedgie if you rode it.
Fun fact, if you type Aquasplash’s name into Google, in the UK at least, the first result it suggests is ‘Aquasplash child death.” (NO no-one actually died there.) God I miss it.
Ahaha I forgot I ever took this. This is Morena Baccarin at a con back in 2008. I didn’t meet her but I did photograph her from the queue! This is before cons started getting really funny about cameras being allowed anywhere near the stars.
Apple harvesting time
Kitty cat admiring, or possibly being disgusted by, all the snow
MY OLD TOY SHELF! Some of these I actually still have, lots of them I have no idea what happened to though.
BEAUTIFUL damn sunset over my old back garden
A less brightly coloured but no less appreciated sunset over Cleethorpes beach
An unimpressed fish.
The windmill at Caldecotte Lake. (I have no idea if it’s still there, I hope it is.)
London as viewed from the Tate Modern art gallery.
Here’s some I particularly like. (Most of these probably weren’t taken by me, though honestly no-one is sure anymore.)
Me getting a copy of Watchmen for my birthday in 2006. I still have it, and a couple of years after this photo was taken I got it signed by Alan Moore. I now have much more mixed feelings about Watchmen and (especially) Moore though. Ya grow.
A sky that looks like it was painted.
A sea lion at Whipsnade Zoo.
Some really colourful flamingos!
Me in my childhood bedroom, dressed up for prom. (Prom is much less of a big deal in Britain. Or it was.) That’s a Darth Maul photo signed by Ray Park in the background. Might be worth a bit less now if recent rumors are anything to go by.
Ashridge Forest and what I only just learned today is called the Bridgewater Monument.
A beautiful contrail.
Skypocalypse
Me on the Cleethorpes beachside minigolf course in 2006. It’s gone now, and I’m not surprised, because they built it on a slope
A pair of lurking lions.
This was from I’m guessing about 15 years ago. I don’t know who took it, probably my dad. It’s Willen Lake at Milton Keynes, but to me it looks like something from Lord of the Rings.
It is hard to believe that 20 years ago today, we got our first collective tease at what would become the greatest film trilogy of all time. (Yea…I said it.) Way back on March 31st, 2000 – New Line sent out an update for those folks subscribed to their newsletter…footage was going to be released…
Today I found some old magazines from almost 20 years ago! Mizz and Shout, if anyone remembers them. I was thrilled. Look!
Celebrity tea!
The pointless quizzes that existed before Buzzfeed cornered the market on pointless quizzes!
Hotties of the era with their names in Comic Sans!
This junk! (It really was junk. Junk not funk.)
Endless, endless denim (but I appreciate they used models who were actual, unglamorous teenage girls)
Michelle Trachtenberg! (My god, these magazines pre-date the end of Buffy.)
Horror stories about mobile phones!
Adverts actually designed to make you feel better about your body! I really hope things like this still exist.
…articles about actual issues that were important to teenage girls…
…really hard-hitting stories about grooming and how it’s never the fault of the victim…
So! I started reading the old magazines thinking I would just end up having a laugh about ’00s fashion but I forgot how genuinely good they were. I legit got an education from teen girl mags of the early noughties.