the real reason he never invites them over
age of ultron spoilers
What Steve’s shield is made of: Vibranium
What Clint’s shield is made of: Quicksilver
[via pissy-dwarf]
Hey, it’s Age of Ultron fic! Featuring the most minor of minor characters, naturally. And spoiler-tagged to heck.
*
My Hero, By Lila Barton
We are not allowed to write this essay about a family member and I think that is stupid because my dad is an actual hero and my mom looks after me and my brother and my baby brother which I think is good. [Lila, it is not nice to call anything stupid – Mrs A] Anyway I decided to write this essay about my aunt. She is not my real aunt, although I have a real aunt who lives in Canada, she is my dads best friend. She is also my moms best friend. When Mom thought her baby was going to be a girl she was going to name it Natasha but it turned out to be a boy so she called it Nathaniel. I like my new brother a lot but he doesn’t do much. Mr Rogers (not that Mr Rogers) came with Auntie Natasha and gave him a bunch of toys and I thought that was silly because he won’t play with them. When I said that Mom told me to show some respect but Mr Rogers just laughed and said I had a healthy attytude [attitude – Mrs A] to grown ups and that was nice.
Auntie Nat brings people to the farm a lot to talk with Mom and Dad. Sometimes she brings Mr Wilson and he is my favorite because he always has sweets and he plays video games with me and Cooper and I think he lets us win which is good because Cooper gets mad when he loses. Anyway one time Auntie Nat came she had another lady with her, who had brown hair and a red jacket, I didn’t know who she was but when she saw the baby she started crying and crying and crying and Mom and Dad and Auntie Nat were nice to her until she stopped crying and she had dinner with us and she left.
Mom says she is the sister of the man who died saving Dad. I forgot to mention that happened. Anyway that was sad but Auntie Nat was nice.
Another thing I remembered just now is when Jessica made fun of me for not having Dad at the father’s day show and we had that fight and Mom had to go to the principal’s office but she had to work and Dad was in England I think because of Thor so Auntie Nat went to see the principal and [this sentence is way too long, Lila – Mrs A] he was really scared of her and she told him Jessica was bullying me and everything was all right. Then she took me to get ice cream and she said that though getting back at people who hurt you feels good it‘s not good and she quoted lots of Star Wars at me and I laughed.
Also she was at the Battle of New York and saved a lot of people. [Maybe this should have been in your opening sentence – Mrs A] She has super abbilitys [abilities – Mrs A] and can kill monsters and robots. That is very good. Mommy says some bad things happened to Auntie Nat in her life and she is honest about them even to newspapers and I think that is good too because people should always tell the truth. But she is mostly my hero because she is nice to me and my brothers and lots of other people and she did not have to be because lots of people who have bad stuff happen are not nice. But she is. That is my essay. Signed Lila Nicole Barton aged 6
I just really want to know what will happen when Pepper hears Vision speak for the first time and is all “the crap did you do to Jarvis, Tony, I thought we tALKED ABOUT A.I.s – I LITERALLY JUST CLEANED UP YOUR ULTRON MESS YOU SWINE”
also shh vision is more like Jarvis than you think and becomes bffs with pepper
The New Avengers
Assembled.
by Dima Ivanov
Ugh looking at this is making me so happy. Like I wasn’t super blown-away by the movie itself but WHO WANTS TO CELEBRATE THIS LINEUP WITH ME, I AM REALLY INTO THIS LINEUP.
Count it off with me, kids:
- two women with very different skill sets and origins, one of whom keeps up with gods and monsters on training and wits alone and the other of whom can apparently not only control the fucking HULK but also effortlessly undo the work of a goddamn INFINITY STONE
- two super-competent black men with absolutely zero “anti-” attached to their “hero”, one of whom is a high-ranked military officer to this day and one of whom has overcome terrible personal trauma while staying a kind and positive and badass human being
- FUCKING ROBOT JESUS, STRAIGHT UP ROBOT JESUS ALIVE AND IN CHARGE AND KICKING ASS IN THE NAME OF CREATION
- Captain Fuck The System
GIVE ME THE FIC. GIVE ME ALL THE FIC.
Age of Ultron!
MASSIVE SPOILERS AHEAD. SO MASSIVE
- Quicksilver
becomes the first big real casualty of the MCU. (Unless I’m forgetting
someone. Which I probably am.) I thought the Cradle of Plot would be
used to save him, but nooope. Poor ‘ol Quicksilver. I half wonder if he
wasn’t offed just because Fox’s version of him was more interesting.
- Hawkeye
is actually kinda the heart of this film, to my not unwelcome surprise.
He has a wife! And kids WHO CALL NATASHA ‘AUNT NAT’ HELP ME MY HEART IS
EXPLODING. I remember the wife and kids from the Ultimates, where they
were all shot in the head. On orders from Natasha. Don’t read the
Ultimates, kids.
- Black Widow herself was very good in this
movie, although I’m not really feeling the Bruce/Natasha thing. I prefer
them as friends. Also, the glimpses of Natasha’s past were EXCELLENT
and I really can’t put into words how MUCH there should be a solo Black
Widow movie. (I know…there have been rumours. Maybe this’ll be the
year they finally come to fruition.)
- Tony was Tony and Steve was
Steve? I dunno, I’m not quite as invested in those two as a lot of
fandom is. I like that their friendship is finally starting to take
shape, though.
- Tony and Thor listing Pepper and Jane’s
respective achievements and fighting over which woman was ‘better’ was
obviously a well-intended scene so I can’t quite bring myself to be mad about it, but I just know it’s going to be used by fandom and the mainstream media to pit the women in question against each other. Just like they do with real-life women. Yay.
- Rhodey! He had quite a big role, actually. Good!
- And FALCON! I was so pleased when I heard he was going to be in it, I love Falcon. He’s only in two scenes, but still, I bet Anthony Mackie exploded with excitement when told about the second one.
- Paul Bettany as Vision was WONDERFUL, I hope he has a big role in the next one
- Scarlet Witch was good, but not as good as her comic book counterpart, whom I keep meaning to read more about.
- Nick Fury’s Crowning Moment Of Awesome was very, very awesome and I loved it.
- There were…wait for it…FIVE WOMEN! in this film. Natasha, Wanda, Maria Hill, Laura Barton (wife of Clint), and Helen Cho. I thoroughly expected Helen to die in one scene (she is virtually the only woman of colour in the MCU after all) but she was actually alright, and I’m glad.
- Also, it just scraped by the Bechdel Test, because Natasha and Laura are friends and they talked! And I want there to be more female friendships in the MCU so I am so glad about that.
- There was a little bit of stuff about civilians casualties/protection/civilians not wanting to be protected by people they can’t trust. That’s the sort of stuff I like and I expect there will be more of it in Civil War, although I am greedy and want it now. (Is this what Daredevil is, because if so I am so there.)
- I am 99% sure a familiar face from The Winter Soldier shows up and, as a fan of the minor characters usually more than I am of the main ones, I was so pleased to see him.
This has probably been speculated about before, but I’m willing to bet that the character B J Britt is potentially playing in Age of Ultron won’t be Tripp, but his Howling Commando ancestor.
(since a. we already know there‘s a flashback set in the WW2 era, and b. we’ve never heard who Tripp’s ancestor is, he could be a Commando we’ve never met before)