lil sketches of an au where harry becomes spiderman instead of peter
#okay but#The Kiss with Harry and Peter
*chinhands* I wanna hear about this
spiderman
imagine one day spidey is held up by the new york city police department, and he’s expecting the same old bullshit of “this stupid spider menace vigilante blah blah blah” like the cops in queens always say to him, but instead he’s met with a 30 year old brooklyn cop who is less concerned with peter being a vigilante, and is more concerned with peter’s powers. he won’t stop asking peter about his spider powers, how they work, how he got them, how he would rate them on a scale of “cool” to “toit”
and finally peter gets a word in edgewise and is like “not that this isn’t refreshing compared to the way the police usually treat me, but what kinda cop are you again??” and the cop is like “i’m actually a detective, jake peralta from the 99th precinct. anyways can you summon an army of spiders or is that just a rumor?? oh my god can you talk to them, can you ask the spiders if they like die hard??”
“Writers should stop erasing Harry’s schizophrenia and other mental disorders or using them as an ableist excuse to turn him into a villain” I say into the mic.
The crowd boos. I begin to walk off in shame, when a voice speaks and commands silence from the room.
“They’re right” he says. I look for the owner of the voice. There in the 5th row stands Harry Osborn himself.
Gwen Stacy for the character meme?
general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life
hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang (but it varies from artist to artist really)
hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff
best quality: Her love of justice
worst quality: She had a really bad temper back in the old days
ship them with: Ooooh lots of people. MJ mostly to be honest. But Peter too sometimes
brotp them with: MJ to a great extent, most of the other Spidey women as well
misc. thoughts: She was more than her death :(
Character thing: Harry Osborn and Mary Jane? 616 continuity.
I’m really behind on 616 continuity but I’ll do my best!
Harry Osborn:
general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life
hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang (but it varies from artist to artist really)
hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff
best quality: Is SO MUCH BETTER than his circumstances could’ve made him. Also is generous and kindhearted and mostly a good friend
worst quality: I want to say he has none but he has plenty. He was pretty horrible to both Peter and Liz in his Green Goblin days
ship them with: PETER, also Liz, also sometimes MJ, he’s a very shippable dude
brotp them with: also PETER, and MJ, and Gwen
misc. thoughts: Please MCU writers if you include him don’t fuck him up please please please
Mary Jane Watson
general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life
hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang
hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff
best quality: Overcame a shitty upbringing to be confident and brave and compassionate
worst quality: Used to be kinda flighty and immature but soon got over it
ship them with: PETER, sometimes Gwen every now and then
brotp them with: Gwen and Harry mostly
misc. thoughts: Why, why why wasn’t Zendaya cast to play her instead of a kinda amalgamation character who shares part of her name, she’d have been so good (I mean, she was good anyway, but still.)
That trailer for the Miles Morales animated movie got me thinking about what I would’ve done had I, via some bizarre time-travelling shenanigans, been in charge of the MCU once they got the rights to Spider-Man back.
Instead of retroactively making the ASM movies part of the MCU, an idea I know was floated… I’d have made the original Sam Raimi movies part of the MCU and then bring Miles Morales in, with Tobey Maguire’s Peter as his mentor. The first MCU Spidey movie would’ve been about MaguirePeter, now in his forties and married to Mary Jane, passing down his mantle to Miles.
Convoluted? Sure! But I bet I could have made it work. You know, if I had had access to aforementioned time travel
