anyways, heres my super lame joke, i hope someone at the nycc panel admits this is exactly what they’ve been planning for all these months: the opportunity of this joke to be used during spooky month
PROSECUTION: The prosecution calls Mr Tracy to the stand.
[All five men instantly stand up]
PROSECUTION: Mr John Tracy.
[JOHN TRACY takes the stand. He’s clearly ill at ease, although his brothers appear to be mouthing encouragement at him]
PROSECUTION: What is your official job title, Mr Tracy?
JOHN TRACY.: Space Command Communications and Dispatcher for IR, sir.
PROSECUTION: Would it be fair to say that prior to the events under discussion, International Rescue specialised exclusively in natural or technological disasters?
JOHN TRACY: We specialise exclusively in rescues, sir.
PROSECUTION: Even when your…rescuees have deliberately put themselves in danger, and are specifically counting on International Rescue to absolve them of responsibility? Or to arrange care for them in a country not their own, where they will be nothing but a heavy burden for the taxpayer?
JOHN TRACY: If people require medical care, we take them to the nearest IR-accredited hospital. That’s a system that’s been in place for ages, and the UN-
PROSECUTION: But you don’t follow up on these people afterwards. If, say, a sinking boat of two hundred refugees is picked up in the Pacific and delivered safely to New Zealand, those two hundred could be left to roam unchecked throughout the whole country.
JOHN TRACY: ‘Roam unchecked’…they’re not cows, sir.
PROSECUTION: Did I say they were cows?
JOHN TRACY: No, sir.
PROSECUTION: This is a serious problem, made even more serious by the fact that it’s only just now come to public attention, wouldn’t you agree?
JOHN TRACY: The people of the GDR…
PROSECUTION: Are, likewise, apparently totally unaware of the scale of the problem.
JOHN TRACY: This has nothing at all to do with New York.
PROSECUTION: Except that it does. It highlights the culture of irresponsibility that you, your family and your extremely wealthy friends have allowed to foster.
[Alan Tracy opens his mouth to speak; gets as far as an “F-” before his eldest brother clamps a hand over his mouth.]
PROSECUTION: If I may, I want to demonstrate to this court just how far the irresponsibility goes. I have here a small sample – very small! – of medical records.
[General mutterings of unease]
PROSECUTION: Here’s yours, John Tracy. Apparently, according to this, you were diagnosed with serious depression while you were studying at Harvard? So serious that your father checked you into a medical facility?
