A fairytale

Once upon a time there was a beautiful Commoner from a far-off land, who was stuck with that label because inexplicably we’re still using it in the twenty-first century. She happened to catch the eye of a handsome prince and the two were married in a grand ceremony.

However, after the wedding a number of townspeople began to turn against the now princess, and started accusing her of bewitching the prince with her cunning feministic ways. Some of them were whipped into a frenzy by a particularly vile troll, who literally could not go a day without complaining that the princess wasn’t interested in him.

Eventually the prince and princess had a baby, and although the people of the kingdom offered congratulations, many of them were also quietly complaining that the princess was tainting the royal family with her foreign blood. Sometimes in those exact words, even.

So unsurprisingly, the prince and princess cut their losses and fled to Canada. The witch-burners got all confused and started looking around for another rich person of colour they could take their various inadequacies out on, and the vile troll pretty much just exploded in a cacophony of barely coherent rage. They all lived unhappily ever after.

The end.