Okay so fun story. I had a history professor who did his thesis work in Germany right around the time the wall was coming down and somehow in the process managed to befriend a former KGB agent.
Now he and the KGB agent got talking and somehow the conversation turned to WWII (as it does with history professors), and the KGB agent happened to mention that he had been on the team of agents tasked with disposing of the bodily remains of Hitler and a few other Nazi higher ups in the early 70s.
According to him they were ordered to drive the ashes to a nearby river and dump them in, but it was cold out and everybody on the detail said screw that. My professor asked him what they did with the remains if they didn’t end up in the river. The KGB agent responded “We, how you say, flush?”
So according to a second hand account from my former history professor the bodily remains of Adolf Hitler most likely ended their days being flushed down the toilet of a Soviet police station.
I have no idea if the story is even the slightest bit true, but if it is I can’t think of a more fitting end.
Dude, I just realized, in Pokemon, they probably use Phantump sightings to local searches for missing people. But it’s like a double edge sword, because you know you’re looking for a body at that point.
Like imagine officer jenny having to report to the family “… I’m sorry… but there’s been a Phantump reported in the area.”
How many kids have died in the damn forest?!
okay but
what if the search team caught the Phantump
and they have to report to the family that their child may never come back as themself, but … perhaps you should have a look at this Pokémon. you might recognize it, or maybe it will recognize you
and okay, it may be a little bit harder to communicate with their little one now, and the future they imagined for the kid may not be a possibility anymore, but they found their baby, it’s right here, it’s safe, not to mention capable of pulling some sick magic tricks so nothing will ever be able to hurt it again
how many Phantump do you think live with their human families still, either because a rescue team caught them and sent them home, or because they found their way back eventually
how many children have kid siblings who just so happen to be Phantump, or big siblings who act like kid siblings because Phantump don’t grow up the same way human kids do
is there a network for people whose children have turned into Phantump so they can trade back and forth and let their little ones grow up into big strong Trevenant and move out into forests of their own
how many family reunions involve a Trevenant lumbering out of a nearby forest like [EARSPLITTING INHUMAN SCREECH] “oh hey, Brenda’s here you guys, welcome home Brenda”
My favourite part of this entire post is the final pic listing the human casualties and losses in the Emu war as “10 000 rounds of ammo.” and “Dignity.”
On Sunday afternoon, MNSBC reported the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers had chosen to deny a permit for the current route of the Dakota Access pipeline, the much-maligned oil pipeline which has drawn thousands of protesters to the Standing Rock Indian Reservation in North Dakota. The Army’s Assistant Secretary for Civil Works Jo-Ellen Darcy has spoken out.
The more I think about it, the more I want Amy to convert to Judaism for Jake. Not because I have any issues with their relationship, but because I think it would be a ~hilarious~ plot line.
Jake is a secular Jew whose connections to Judaism are more cultural than anything else. Meanwhile, Amy is the most intense pupil/researcher on the planet who has never half-assed anything in her entire life. Can you even imagine how seriously she would take Judaism and her conversion and how much that would drive Jake up the flipping wall?
Imagine Jake buying that one T-Rex menorah and Amy telling him they can’t use it because it’s not a kosher Chanukiah. And Jake’s like “huh? What? It’s a dinosaur, Amy, not a pork chop.”
Imagine Jake offering to sound out the Hebrew in a siddur for Amy with his remedial Aleph-Bet skills to discover she’s already mastered how to read the letters without vowels and is also becoming proficient in modern conversational Hebrew.
Imagine Amy hosting a THE PERFECT Seder (that Charles has enthusiastically cooked for after learning all about kosher laws, having his kitchen completely kashered, and making a menu that includes Jewish cuisines from around the world) that Jake ruins after being caught eating doughnuts in the bathroom because he hates matzah.
Bonus points if Amy finds out she descends from Sephardim and lectures Jake about his Ashkenazi centrism!
