Luke Skywalker Fucks the Timeline AU
Luke @ seeing Anakin and Padmé: Mom! Dad!!
Luke when everyone starts freaking the frickle frack out after he says it: Oh poodoo, that was a secret wasn’t it? WELL. That’s what you get for not telling us anything about her and making any mention of her existence a criminal offense in the future, Father! How was I supposed to know it was a secret relationship? Oh hi, Ben. Yoda. Did you know there’s a really tall Force Ghost screaming at the two of you? What? You can’t see him?? He’s literally right there. His name is Quaggan or something and—JABBA THE HUTT’S GIANT FUCKING JUGULAR, IS THAT A DROID WITH FOUR LIGHTSABERS?????!?!? AND WHOSE THAT GUY? AND THAT ONE? WHY DO THEY ALL LOOK ALIKE? WAIT. I’VE NEVER BEEN ON CORUSCANT BEFORE, I’M GONNA GO SIGHTSEE.
Leia while currently choking Palpatine Jabba Style in the distance and singlehandedly defeating the Separatists with a glare, all while keeping her identity secret: Luke, tf.
oh my god I’m laughing so hard this is so funny and so real Luke would be The Worst time-traveler
And then Luke sees Palps and Anakin interact /once/ and is like, “DAD WTF HOW DID YOU FALL FOR THIS SHIT EVEN I’M NOT FALLING FOR THIS”