Someone one day is going to write a play where all the wronged ladies of Shakespeares plays get together for an angry musical like Chicago but in iambic pentameter
All I need is a shakespeare version of cell block tango
Here you go:
Methinks that yonder fop, yon ruffian,
Doth heartily deserve this punishment.
O, he alone, alone unlucky man,
Should shoulder blame for this his long lament!
If you, fair youth, had been where I have been,
If you, fair youth, had seen what I have seen,
I’ faith you’d not endure such hateful sin,
But make no less a mess than this, my scene!
This fate this man could not hope to escape,
This fault in him not go unpunishéd–
To crush a blooming flower out of shape,
Until the sweet perfume and beauty fled.
O, if this man met death before his time,
Then certain it was murder, but no crime!