A snippet from a Steven Universe fanfic I will (probably) never get around to writing

I thought of this fic whilst unable to sleep one night. The basic plot was, “Mayor Dewey attempts a one-man production of Les Miserables to impress Pearl; fails; it transpires the Crystal Gems were in fact present during the real events depicted in the musical.” Yes, it was a Steven Universe/Les Miserables crossover. Amazing. But there was this bit I remember that I liked, based on the theory that Pearl is just one of many Pearls and a “defective” one:

“Do you know what her second name is?” Garnet asked.

Mayor Dewey appeared to be concentrating hard. “Her name,” he said with utter certainty, “is Pearl Cunningham-Smythe.”

“No.”

“Oh good. I made that up.”

“Her name is just Pearl. She doesn’t have a second name.”

“Well, that’s just silly,” said Mayor Dewey. “How would you tell her apart from all the other Pearls?”

“How indeed,” said Garnet.