#’go and work at Stormcage’ they said #’it’ll be fun’ they said #’how on earth did you get sacked after the first day?’ they said #no but srsly lol #poor guy #first day at job – and he’s guarding river #and she wants to escape#sucks to be you dude #but idk why they keep on trying to keep her in her cell when she intends on leaving it #I mean sure – I can understand that they tried to stop fer from escaping the first time #and the second time #and the sixth and ninth #but after her bazillionth attempt – bazillionth attempt that ended with success #they just should’ve stopped #and help her with packing #’which dress do you want me to pack dr Song? how many guns? condoms?’ #’dress warmly dr Song! and eat regularly’#’see you later doctor Song!’ #doctor who #river song #queen of all the time and space (via your-bespoke-psychopath)
#I bet they put him there on purpose#guarding River’s cell is like Stormcage hazing #the other guards are in the control room #watching the monitors and trading bets #somebody brought pretzels and they’re elbowing each other and offering live commentary #DON’T BRING HER THE PHONE MAN IT IS A TRAP #oh god #he’s so dumb #what do you think? is she gonna knock him out? #use the lipstick #aww man I love the lipstick #BEST DISCIPLINARY ACTION EVER #oh oh oh LOOK #SHE IS REACHING FOR THE CLEAVAGE #LIPSTICK IT IS #WIN #OH YOU STUPID BASTARD YOU DIDN’T EVEN NOTICE!!! #did he just TELL her it’s his first day? #GOD DAMMIT MAN ARE YOU STUPID? #DID YOU NOT PAY ATTENTION IN ORIENTATION? #oh – oh – AND THERE HE GOES #you dumbass #Bye River #oh look she’s drawing something #should we sound the alarm? #nahhhh #man I hope she brings us back something good#last time she went to some planet called America and brought us all back these calandars (via areyoumarriedriver)
THIS NEEDS TO BE A FIC
YESTERDAY