These musings actually have very little to do with John Green, I don’t know him, have read exactly one of his books and have no idea about his politics etc – but that post he made and the fallout from it (you’ve already seen it, I’m sure) have got me really worried in a vague sort of way. Sometimes, I sort of already feel like I’m too old for fandom and for tumblr – I know officially tumblr’s main demographic is 30+ or something, but in specifically fandom spaces generally the majority of people there are children. And I write lots of fanfiction for stuff that’s aimed at children – Adventure Time, TAG, Doctor Who to some extent – and I enjoy getting good reviews/kudos/praise for them. So I can’t shake the feeling I’m basically…all up in other group’s space, trying to dominate it, like an grown adult on a bouncy castle or something. Or maybe not. I don’t know. Fandom wasn’t a safe space for children when I first discovered it at twelve, it wasn’t a safe space for teenagers when I was on Livejournal at sixteen, and nothing’s really changed at all. I see that every single day on here. Man.
I still desperately want to be a YA author (TRAJT is actually more than halfway done as of last week) and still be part of wider fandom culture – still making Doctor Who graphics, writing meta about popular movies, responding to fanworks made about my stuff the way almost everyone on here dreams of – but the more I think about it, the more I’m not sure you can do it without there being a colossal power imbalance. And I’d like to have Social Media Power! I could use it to draw attention to all sorts of important issues, raise money for charity, talk about my mental illnesses to spread visibility and awareness etc. But I think the old adage about people who want power being the last ones who should have it is probably true in this case as well.